Foods that offend me

Posted on April 21, 2012

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Argh! What's that?

Nobody needs a microwave panini. One, it’s disgusting. Two, it is stupidly easy to make a panini. Three, it’s just plain disgusting.

Who ever thought microwaving bread was a good idea? The whole point of a sandwich is that it’s quick and easy. But I don’t have a panini machine, I hear calls from the back. I’ll let you in on a secret – bread gets warm if you put it in the oven. It might not be as flat, but I’m sure that’s something you can work around.

Ready-to-heat burgers fit into this category as well, possibly even more offensive as they usually contain something pretending to be meat. Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up a little bit.

Instant pasta. Open a bag, add hot water, stir and the dust-like particles magically morph into globules. Okay, but to cook actual pasta – real life pasta – all you need to do is put it in a pan with hot water for 10 minutes. How is eating some freeze-dried food imposter preferable to 10 minutes and a direct heat source? Same deal for anything containing noodles.

What’s most annoying about these ‘foods’ is that all of them are things that are so damn easy to make properly. Were it a gourmet meal in a bag that tasted almost as good as the real thing once you coaxed some heat into it, I might understand the appeal. I cannot in any way understand the appeal of using a shortcut to make something that would take perhaps five minutes longer to do properly.

Image from gordasm‘s Flickr photostream.

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Posted in: cuisine